If you were repeatedly told not to play with your food as a child, Barton G. The Restaurant just might be the perfect place for you.
Just a few blocks away from Lincoln Road, Barton G. seems like your average high-end Miami hotspot. The bar area is jam-packed with fashionable 20-something-year-olds mingling, laughing, engaging in small talk and clinking wine glasses as they wait for their tables. The décor is just as hip and trendy as its guests: unique, spherical lamps that resemble dandelions dangle from the ceiling, garlands of fresh flowers in test tubes create a make-shift wall between the bar and the restaurant, and curtains of red, shimmery scales cover the walls.
We were seated in the outdoor garden, which is just as bold and ornate as the interior, with wild, dense, jungle-like foliage and all-white furniture. It was much quieter and more tranquil outdoors than it was indoors, which made our meal that much more enjoyable.
Granted, this is not my usual scene — I’m much more of an “underrated, quiet, casual, little hole-in-the-wall” kind of girl — and the thick crowds certainly made me feel a little bit out of my element. The fact that my reservation was at 10:30 p.m. — the earliest reservation available — and I was tired after a long evening exploring local art galleries certainly didn’t help. However, I was curious to see what the hype was all about, and it was an excuse to get all dressed up on a Friday night.
To my surprise, the environment and clientele were not the only extravagant things at Barton G.: each menu item came served on a whimsical and unique themed dish. Customers picked pieces of a pink, fluffy cotton candy wig off the head of a silver, plastic bust. Homemade lobster pop tarts popped out of a retro, 1950s-esque mint green toaster. An irresistibly cheesy mac and cheese was delivered on a giant mousetrap as a plate, protecting the classic favorite from any unwanted forks.
Our appetizer, popcorn shrimp, served inside a vintage movie theater popcorn popper, took the word “popcorn” literally. The lightly-breaded, savory bites of shrimp came with a sweet chili sauce on the side, creating a delicious blend of sweet, salty and just a hint of zesty with each taste. Even after we finished the shrimp, our appetizer was not over: the popcorn popper was filled with a sea of warm, buttery popcorn, contributing to the theme.
Easily my favorite dish at Barton G., the lobster mac and cheese was just as rich and succulent as it sounds. The fresh, soft, delicate bits of lobster baked into the cheese made the dish even creamier — a feat I didn’t think was possible. The entrée had a beach-themed presentation: the placemat was an image of a sandy coastline, creating the illusion that my entrée, along with a seashell-decorated lobster trap, just washed up on the beach — but not in a gross way. The best part? My lobster trap had a cute little rubber lobster inside. Whoever is in charge of decorating the dishes at Barton G. certainly pays attention to detail.
Dessert is always the best part of every meal, and, at Barton G., they certainly make sure their dessert leaves a lasting impression. Our funnel cake was not just a funnel cake: it was a whole carnival experience. The funnel cake glittered with decorative sparklers. With just a flick of a switch, the bold, bright background, covered in stripes and primary colors, transformed into a carnival game. Bright lights twinkled across the board, and a catchy little tune filled the air as the blinking scoreboard challenged us to pick up a toy gun and shoot as many moving cardboard ducks as possible. The funnel cake itself was massive: it was easily enough to feed a family of 10 and was certainly too much for my party of two.
Barton G. is the perfect place to celebrate special occasions, big birthdays and important accomplishments. It’s also ideal for couples who are looking to wow their significant other on a romantic date. Keep in mind that meals at Barton G. are not cheap: the funnel cake dessert itself, a snack you can find at any local fair for about $5, was $34, and every other dish was just as pricy.
Also, just like any crowded restaurant, Barton G. is certainly not a place to go to on an empty stomach because the wait times are extremely long. We waited for our table for an hour — yes, a whole hour, even with a reservation. We were not seated until 11:30 p.m. But, regardless of the inconvenience, a meal at Barton G. is definitely worth the wait.
