Another study conducted by the Why Are We Like This Foundation found that the average American — especially current and incoming college students — suffers significantly negative effects of high levels of stress. The University of Pretending To Get It will implement another graduation requirement that is not only non-essential to their students, but is a significant time commitment.
President of the University of Pretending to Get It, Hay Tess Yoo, said he isn’t “exactly sure” what this curriculum requirement will entail but that it will probably be around 15 hours a week, which follows the trends of other universities across the nation implementing requirements like this.
“People, especially students, only have so much time. And since realistically there’s no need to do this,” said Yoo, “I want to make sure that it’ll be a valuable learning experience.”
Yoo theorized that by overloading students now, he can hopefully break the trend, like the one found by the foundation, of people feeling overwhelmed by their responsibilities.
“The trick is to break down the individual so much that they no longer feel that overwhelming stress,” said Yoo. “We have to find a way to numb the brain and emotions because clearly what we have done so far as a society isn’t working.”
Normen Mann, a sophomore at the university, said that word of this new mystery requirement “literally makes [him] want to die” and that the “incredibly vast and depressing amount of debt” he’s collected over the past two years is the only reason he plans to return in the fall — he doesn’t want to waste the money.
“It’s like, I already go to school full-time, I’ve had an internship and have another one in the works, I work twice the amount experts say you’re supposed to in school,” explained Mann. “I know I could be doing more but …”
Yoo said that he plans to inform students of what exactly the graduation requirement will be at a press conference held during an extremely inconvenient time over the summer.
“I’m thinking if it’s not expensive, move-in week,” he said. “But if it is expensive, I’ll definitely tell them the day before classes begin.”
