If you’re someone who easily sweats the small stuff, it’s possible you’ve been told to just, “Let it go.” However unhelpful that phrase might have felt at the time, the truth is, whoever said it had a point regardless if they realized it or not.
According to Jen Sincore, a counselor at the NSU Center for Student Counseling and Well Being (previously known as Henderson Student Counseling Services), ‘letting go’ is “something that is largely personally defined. For me, it means catching myself whenever I’m having thoughts along the lines of ‘should’ or ‘should not’ and trying to shift to more of an approach of ‘okay, now what?’”
Oftentimes, people have thought that ‘letting go’ means not caring or ignoring how they feel, but really, it’s quite the opposite. Instead of ignoring your thoughts and feelings, you’re choosing to acknowledge them and move forward, whether it be by deciding to let go of those thoughts and emotions or doing something positive about them.
“‘Letting go’ does not mean ‘just relax’ or ‘get over it.’ It can be helpful to think of it as, ‘Okay, I do not like and would not have chosen this current reality. And, at the same time, what is within my power at this point?’ The ‘Now what?’ can look like a combination of actions [as well as] looking at other perspectives. Actions could take many different forms, including trying an alternative route to reach a goal or utilizing additional supports. Looking at a variety of perspectives can look like striking a balance between the current moment and the big picture,” said Sincore.
Despite some criticisms the art of ‘letting go’ has faced, there are actually a lot of mental health and life benefits that come with just ‘letting go.’ From gaining confidence to improving the quality of your life by being at peace and tranquility, ‘letting go’ is something very easily found in nature, the place some of us forget we came from. You don’t see animals stressing over things that have happened or haven’t happened yet. This stress and anxiety comes from the societal conditioning we’ve received as humans.
“I think this is something that a lot of people have difficulty sitting with because it’s often interpreted as a dismissal of current distress and ‘just think positive’ to the exclusion of legitimate pain or discomfort. Often, two things can be true at the same time, even if they seem opposed to each other… Sometimes, the unpleasant experiences give way to the pleasant ones that we prefer and at times promote growth,” said Sincore.
The art and act of ‘letting go,’ like many other things requires practice. Your first time ‘letting go’ of an emotion, thought or experience will seem much more difficult than the times that follow. However, the important thing about ‘letting go’ is that it brings you back to the present moment. Instead of focusing your energy and attention to things outside of your control that may or may
not be true — sometimes, our minds create scenarios that are not fully representative of reality — ‘letting go’ helps you to remember what’s currently happening around you and how to find positivity in that moment.
“I think it can be helpful to strike a balance between the current moment and the big picture. It’s important to give space to our current experience for acknowledgement and processing. Sometimes, we also underestimate our resiliency. Part of resiliency is utilizing additional supports — whether family and friends or professional resources like academic tutors or counselors. What can also be helpful is trying to remember that, at the end of the day, we are continuously doing the best we can with what we have in a given moment and every human on this earth is kind of figuring things out as they accrue more experience. I definitely encourage students to utilize the resources available to them including the Center for Student Counseling and Well-Being,” said Sincore.
‘Letting go’ can look different for everyone. Some can find this peace of mind by being out in nature, others by doing activities they really enjoy and some may even find it by just meditation or being in silence. Regardless of how you ‘let go,’ remember the benefits that it brings you. Remember, everything begins in your mind. When you choose to focus your energy on something that brings you joy and is positive and ‘let go’ of the negativity you’re holding on to, you’ll see a major difference in your day-to-day life.
