After the rise of the “#MeToo” movement, it has become marginally easier for people to share their stories and speak up about the mistreatment they’ve received. Whether it’s been in their industry, in their relationship, in their cities or elsewhere, it seems there are new stories coming out every day. I am so proud of the people, mainly women, who are brave enough to speak up and have paved the way for others who have been mistreated to tell their own stories. I am so glad that so many people can share their support online and demand justice.
However, I am tired of seeing the sources of their mistreatment trending.
Whenever I hear someone telling their story, their name is not always the first name that I see in reference. Often times, the person or company that has been causing the issue. Conversations about the subject are crowded, not with support for the person who has been mistreated but with frustrations by fans of the abuser. I see comments from fans saying how frustrated they are with the person in the wrong, or comments saying that they thought differently of that person or company. While people are allowed to feel however they feel about something, especially fans who may genuinely be disappointed, I think that conversations often center around the wrong person in the situation.
People should be focusing on supporting the complainant and uplifting their voice and others who have similar stories instead of trying to focus attention on the person or company who caused the issue. While it is important to hold people and companies accountable and listen to all people involved, the giant social media presence in some of these cases often emits the actual issue in a flood of arguments, victim-blaming and pointing of fingers. Flooding the replies of their latest Instagram post is not going to make the issue go away, and while it may make a statement come out faster, a statement or half-hearted apology does not go very far.
Arguing amongst fans about who is in the wrong and about whether an apology or statement is genuine or not is not helpful to anyone. In order to truly hold people accountable and show our support, we need to make space for victims to tell their stories and support them instead of drowning them out with our own thoughts and feelings on the subject in the endless echo chamber that is the internet. We owe them respect and, if you are truly passionate about the issue, you should be putting energy into making sure that they are heard instead of giving your own statements and opinions on it.
