A little child shall lead them: Challenging the “pink for girls, blue for boys” mentality

In January, “The Today Show” featured a young boy, Dyson Kilodavis, who liked to dress up in girls clothing, specifically pink tutus. His mother, Cheryl, defended her son’s choice of clothing, even writing a book called “My Princess Boy,” which is based on Dyson.

Dyson is a sweet and outgoing 5-year-old boy who is about to enter kindergarten. He loves climbing trees and his favorite colors are pink, purple, and red. Dyson also likes to wear pink tutus.

Beginning at the age of two, Dyson began wearing girls’ clothing because he liked the way it felt. His family grew to support his choice and his mother wrote a book entitled “My Princess Boy.” This inspiring story would be perfect. Except for one sad problem.

Dyson wants to attend school in his pink tutu.

I desperately wish this was a conceivable dream. For, if he goes through with this, it will turn into a nightmare.

Children can be cruel. And adults can be no different. From the Romans brutal Christian gladiator fights to the torture of Jews in the Holocaust, history is filled with examples of how society persecutes those who are different.

Right now, Dyson is so filled with innocence and joy. It breaks my heart to think that such a special young boy might be tormented by the unjust bigotry of our society. His unique spirit shouldn’t suffer from those who cannot see his bravery in publicly showing that he’s proud of who he is.

He won’t change what makes him different. He won’t hide what makes him special. He won’t stop being what challenges the norms of society. And that makes this child braver than many adults.

I applaud his parents for supporting him. Some would try to change their child, make him something other then what he is. Their support will give him strength as he faces the hard times ahead.

But, the mother paints a pretty picture of people offering support to Dyson. I was surprised and thrilled at this news. Yet, this flowery fantasy of worldwide public support might not continue into the tough times ahead for little Dyson when he enters the rough terrain of middle school and high school.

I was bullied in sixth grade when I accidentally got a haircut ala Demi Moore in Ghost. For three months, I came home in tears. And no matter how much my mom said it would pass, their words still hurt. I remember it to this day. And that was only three months, and relatively mild compared to the bullying young Dyson will no doubt encounter.

Will Dyson be able to cope with the bullying in school because he has such strong familial support? It’s a possibility but not a probability. Humans are social animals and we crave to fit in with peer groups.

While his parents’ support will soothe some grief, the agony he’ll suffer at school will be ever-present in his mind. Dyson’s older brother asked their parents why can’t they just let the young boy be happy? This spurred the couple to accept their child the way he is. I wish the rest of our society was so understanding.

Why can’t we just let Dyson be happy? Such a simple question with no easy answers.

There’s violence to be wary of as well. Boys are more likely to act out physically when it comes to bullying. The thought of physical violence against young Dyson turns my stomach.

There’re schools that he can attend which are more open-minded about children like Dyson. I’m not saying to separate him from the other kids in his neighborhood. They can give the local school a try. But if it proves too hard on the child, then transfer him to a place where he will be safe, both physically and mentally.

It’s not a solution, but a temporary fix. There’ll be no solution until we can educate the mainstream about issues such as this. Until we can rise to a level of absolute tolerance.

But, just like world peace, I don’t see that happening anytime soon. Before you judge my opinion that Dyson shouldn’t attend school in his tutu, I urge you to watch a video of him playing. Look at the innocence and purity of his spirit. Then imagine that young spirit dimmed by the cruelty of a society that decimates all those who dare to be extraordinary.

I emphatically agree that all people should be able to express their individuality in public. A man or woman should be able to dress as they please and proudly show it to the world. Unfortunately, the ignorance of the world we live in still causes us to fight for that.

But a 5-year-old boy shouldn’t be the one to fight that battle.

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