October is Domestic Violence Awareness month, and an aspect of raising awareness is discussing how to prevent and cope with domestic violence. Since many people are not fully aware of what constitutes abuse, domestic violence has in cases gone unnoticed, resulting in perpetuated cycle of abuse.
Domestic abuse is defined by the National Network to End Domestic Violence as any sort of emotional or physical aggression within a home and is often associated with spousal abuse. Aside from physical violence, victims can also be emotionally and psychologically abused. These forms of abuse don’t leave physical marks, but they are harmful nonetheless. The physical violence itself also causes the victim to undergo emotional trauma.
It must be established that domestic violence can affect anyone. A common misconception is that women are the only victims when men and women are equally subject to domestic violence. According to the National Coalition against Domestic Violence, one in three women and one in four men have been victims of some sort of physical violence from their partner at some time in their life.
Always remember that abuse is never the victim’s fault; it is the fault of the person who is inflicting mental or physical pain upon others. In order to prevent the perpetrators from inflicting pain upon other individuals, it is essential to raise awareness and put an end to their abusive tendencies.
It is extremely important to know that if you are being abused or know someone who is a victim of domestic violence, there are resources available to get advice and help.
These steps can help you escape the cycle of violence:
Step 1: Admit it to yourself. The first step when in an abusive relationship is to realize and accept that you are a victim of domestic abuse. Sometimes the signs will not be as apparent as a beating or as verbal insults. Looking for signs of possessiveness and assertiveness are important early signals to catch. In order to resolve this mental strain, it is essential to first realize and accept that you are suffering abuse.
Ron Osborne-Williams, education and prevention manager for Women in Distress, said that people can recognize physical violence but often fail to notice verbal or emotional violence.
“Someone may not be [physically] affecting you, but it can change who you are as a person, and before that happens, it is essential to realize that you are being abused,” he said.
Step 2: Speak up. Talking to a friend or a family member can help alleviate stress temporarily, and they might be able to help you stay away from the abuser and give you a safe place to stay while you seek help. In seeking help, never feel like you are showing weakness, and, instead, feel courageous.
Make sure that you reach out to a professional who can help you mentally collect yourself such as a counselor or a therapist.
“Support groups and counselors are extremely important in the process of recovering from such traumatic experiences,” Osborne-Williams said.
Step 3: Call a hotline. Abusive relationships are extremely difficult especially because the offender is someone who you know and care about. Sometimes, you may not feel comfortable telling a close friend or relative. Other times, you may not know what to do out of fear that your abuser might retaliate and become more violent.
This is when help hotlines come into play. There are numerous organizations that have dedicated themselves to helping victims of domestic violence.
“Prevention is the number-one reason why hotlines are available,” Osborne-Williams said. “When people are in these situations, they often feel hopeless, and getting them information through these hotlines can help change that.”
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is open 24/7, and counselors provide information about shelters, health care centers and counseling to victims. The hotline number is 1-800-799-SAFE. Additionally, the rape and abuse hotline, 1-800-656-HOPE, is the largest anti-sexual assault hotline. Use these hotlines to your advantage, and keep yourself safe.
Step 4: Call the police. If at any time you are being harmed, abused or are in fear for your life, call 911 immediately. Abuse is always an emergency. It is important to understand that domestic violence is a threat to your safety and health.
There are many people who go through the challenges of domestic violence. Knowing that there are resources available to help victims cope is also key to raising awareness. If you need a good place to receive help, the Women in Distress Foundation is a great place to start. Their website is womenindistress.org, and they can be contacted at 954-761-1133, or you can contact Thehoteline.org, a 24-hour abuse service, at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
