College is a time to make new friends, and in some cases, have relationships and explore your sexuality. However, COVID-19 has put significant restraints on this particular experience. To be clear, this pertains to college students who are consenting adults and can make their own decisions for their health and future well-being. Even though they won’t get scolded for going on a date or put in jail after having a consensual one-night stand for disobeying social distancing rules, it’s important to understand the risks of dating and have guidance to navigate around our current state. So, if you are looking for someone to keep you company, a long-term relationship or even just someone new to talk to, here is all you should know about dating during COVID-19.
Where to begin
Just like anything else in life, we have to start with the basics. The first question to ask is how will two people meet? In every romantic comedy, it is all about the perfect “meet-cute,” but with mask-wearing and almost all public spaces having limited interactions, it may be hard to meet organically. This is the time to turn to those already in your contact list or make a dating profile. According to Business Insider, Match Group — which owns over 45 popular dating brands and 60% of the online dating market — found a 15% increase in new subscribers since the COVID-19 shutdown. Dating apps like Bumble, Hinge and Tinder have adjusted to the pandemic by adding video chat and phone call functions, allowing users to connect through virtual dates.
For those who are uninterested in swiping through potential suitors, it may be time to look to people within your circle like an old friend, crush or classmate. If you are interested and feel comfortable, asking to go out for coffee — with respect to CDC guidance — may be a way to foster a new connection with someone with a little old-fashioned “meet-cute” flair.
If you are the type of person that prefers in-depth research prior to starting a relationship, there is another resource that might help. In June, the New York City Department of Health released a pdf providing guidance and details that people should know about the relationship between COVID-19 and safe sex practices.
The new “talk”
According to NPR, in the same way partners discuss expectations, consent, boundaries and safety in terms of their sexual health, partners should also have a conversation about COVID-19.
Are you willing to socially-distance? Are you or those you interact with considered high-risk for COVID-19? Are you willing to get tested before intimacy? These are just some of the questions that should come up when you talk about other mental and physical health-related topics in terms of your relationship. It should be a top priority for you and your partner to be comfortable with each other’s decisions and be aware how — now more than ever — your personal choices can affect your partner and those they care about.
In times of doubt, take it at your pace
If the idea of intimacy makes you anxious, or if you are generally open to connections, but COVID-19 has made you apprehensive, you are not alone. Major publications like The New York Times, NPR, Forbes and more have published articles answering all kinds of questions that readers have on this topic with sex experts, doctors and other public health experts giving their two cents.
It’s hard to justify that singles or new couples should remain celibate until they are free to socially connect again. Liana Chaouli, CEO and Founder of Image Therapists, stated in Forbes that COVID-19 isn’t going away. So, individuals can either regress or adapt to the new situation at hand. The bottom line is that as long as you do what you and your partner are comfortable with, within your own boundaries and by following CDC guidelines to the best of your ability, you are doing the right thing.
If you decide to start a new relationship, restart an old one or even just live the single life and take some time for yourself, be confident that all those decisions are within your control and you have all the tools you need to make the best decision.
