Seriously Kidding: Santa Claus is a Democrat

I think we can all easily say that Santa Claus truly is a democrat. The man goes around handing out free things to everyone. Where does all this money come from? Does he have a budget? Is he piggybacking of the backs of the hardworking taxpayers? These are the real issues America needs to be talking about. I have to admit there was a brief period of time when I thought Bernie Sanders’ night job was wearing a red suit. I think it’s safe to assume that Santa is just a plain old Democrat.

It starts with toys and clothes and then before you know it, he’ll be handing out free healthcare and college tuition. Santa must be stopped, he is trying to bankrupt America. We have to save the taxpayer’s money for more important issues such as building a wall or funding Rick Scott’s ventures. We have been getting an increased number of immigrants coming from the North Pole seeking refuge. What exactly is going on over there? Even the penguins are running!

I think we need to take a good look at Santa’s “workshops.” If he plans on handing out things for free, how are working conditions at these workshops? I hope he pays his “elves” the minimum wage the democrats are fighting so hard for. I for one demand answers, Santa has some explaining to do. No wonder the North Pole is so secretive. Santa doesn’t want his horrendous deeds to come out in the open. Just like a typical democrat to exploit people to help others. Why can’t he be more like the republicans, they exploit people to help themselves.

Is this what we want our children to be taught? That we must make sacrifices to help others instead of helping ourselves? Ridiculous, this man is a menace to our society. We have to continue caring for only ourselves.

Another thing that bothers me is his reindeers. What kind of illegal concoction is he using to make them fly? That’s some serious mistreating of animals. I am willing to bet he wasn’t a part of the animal rights movement. Wake up people! Is this the kind of man you want to tell your children about? I say no more, no more stories and no more songs. We have given this man too much of a platform. We have to shut him down before he runs in an election and changes our hard earned republican policies.

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