On Oct. 17, it was announced that NSU’s Fort Lauderdale/Davie Campus will serve as the next filming location for an unrevealed movie-streaming giant. Hollywood producers behind the hit show, Streamdale, have reached an agreement with NSU President George Hanbury that will give them full access to NSU facilities, including students’ residence halls. Stars from the […]
Category: Satire
Seriously Kidding: NSU alert voice changes due to student interest
NSU has a fantastic alert system put in place to warn students about occurrences such as lightning strikes from impending storms and for general emergency alerts, but some students want change. Stacy Speakeasy, a member of the Voice of the People club, said, “The siri-like voice of the alert system is too jaded-sounding and overall […]
Seriously Kidding: Professor passes all students on account of “all answers” being right
She’s every student’s dream come true. Nora Ong, professor in the College of Finding the Self, has announced that she will not fail any student who takes her midterm this week because any answer could be the right one. “Truth is really subjective anyway that you look at it,” said Ong. “Facts are malleable and […]
Seriously Kidding: Investigation proves White House Economic Adviser Gary Cohn is actually from a different planet
It didn’t take much for Leonardo Averagio, NSU doctoral student in the College of Common Sense, to realize what he found — after all he had been studying it for years. As he sat and watched a press conference on Sept. 28 where White House Economic Adviser Gary Cohn discussed the baseline for President Trump’s […]
Seriously Kidding: NSU Faculty petition to cancel hurricanes
“It’s just too much,” said Brad Ketchup, associate professor in the college of osteopathic medicine. Ketchup is one of about 50 professors at NSU who is petitioning what seems to be a very controversial cause: they want hurricanes to be canceled. After Hurricane Irma ravaged the Caribbean and South Florida, and with Maria following not […]
Seriously Kidding: College students prepare to survive nuclear war
He’s done it again: He tested his science experiment enough to unsettle the sea of angry neighbors at his doorstep. While the panic raged on, the loudmouth took his thoughts to Twitter. “Hostile and dangerous” were his words. Did that stop the science nerd? Not really. This may have sounded like a college student’s average […]
Seriously Kidding: FreeDumb Reigns
With three weeks to go before the start of the Fall 2017 semester, most college students had begun to purchase school supplies and order textbooks. FreeDumb, the online organization responsible for leaking digital copies of college textbooks, had other plans. The perception of the group changes depending on which circle you stand in, with some […]
Seriously Kidding: Student attends “Suddenly Last Summer,” misses plotline by talking the whole time
When Gabby Silverstein, sophomore business administration major, found out that she had to review a play for the theater class she took as an elective, she thought the PVA’s showing of “Suddenly Last Summer” would be the perfect opportunity. The cast and production team have a reputation for putting on great performances, and Silverstein loved […]
Seriously Kidding: New Zelda title inadvertently brings world peace
By: Aidan Rivas Nintendo’s newest title in the famed Legend of Zelda franchise, “The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild,” met unparalleled renown when it hit the shelves on March 3. The response to the game has been overwhelmingly positive, with the title selling millions of copies on its opening day. Sources say it […]
Seriously Kidding: NSU club earns a million dollars for selfless community service
NSU’s Theme Park Club (TPC) has earned over a million dollars in funding through their community service hours. The club plans to use the money to fund upcoming trips to Disney World, Universal Studios, SeaWorld, Legoland and Busch Gardens. The club, which has 60 members and is growing by the day, earned a million dollars […]